The Cream of a Tulip
by xXRottWeilerXx
Summary: If I can, I would give you a red tulip. But I can't, because I can never replace her, and for that I'll give you a cream tulip instead. Because a cream tulip means eternal love, and my love for you is nothing but eternal.


**The Cream of a Tulip  
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A/N: Hey there, I just had this muse going on and I decided to get it out of my head. There might be a sequel to this oneshot, depending on the responses I get. If this story ends up to be an abomination in the eyes of the FanFic Lord, I might just delete this one. It's really up to you guys though. Great supporters make great fanfics, no?

Enjoy!

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><p><em><strong>Who do you turn to when the only person in the world that can stop you from crying, is exactly the one making you cry?<strong>_

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><p>"Ne, Rukia-chan… did you know…"<p>

Said name looked up from her sketching pad to look at her friend. She adjusted the vice-captain amulet on her left shoulder as she turned to Orihime.

"Know what?"

Orihime's eyes looked at Rukia for a while, and something akin to longing flashed through her eyes before she averted her gaze to the red tulip she was looking at. She was clad in a pair of shinigami shihakushou, most probably lend by Rangiku when she went to Soul Society after being summoned by Yamamoto-soutaichou regarding her unique god-like powers. Some of her long hair was held into a bun and as usual, she looked stunning. Rukia's gaze followed the healer's grey eyes to look at the red flower that she plucked from the Kuchiki garden in her hands. After a few seconds, Orihime continued.

"Do you know what girls usually give men during Valentine's?"

Rukia thought for a moment before she turned back to her sketching pad to draw a six-packed rectangle-shaped object.

"Yeah… girls usually give guys these chocolate stuff… and red roses… stuff like that. Why? Is it Valentine's Day already?"

Something clicked in her head before she teasingly nudged Orihime in the ribs. "Ohoho… did you give Ichigo some chocolate?"

Rukia half-expected her friend to tell her that she gave Ichigo a wasabi-flavored chocolate, so when she saw Orihime shook her head without blushing, she knew something was off.

The healer gave her a small smile, a smile that didn't reach her eyes like it used to. Orihime had been giving those half-hearted smiles a little bit too much recently, and it kind of worried Rukia. Did Ichigo notice his girlfriend didn't smile as brightly as she used to?

"Valentine's was over a few weeks ago, Rukia-chan."

"Hm… Orihime?"

The girl didn't even look up from the flower in her hands when she answered Rukia. "Yes?"

The older woman put down her black marker and turned fully towards her friend. She put both hands on Orihime's shoulder and squeezed gently.

"Are things between you and Ichigo ok? I mean, you both just got together and you're both studying at the same University, right? I don't know about that idiot, but you've been together for quite a while already but you seem… I don't know… a bit sad… at something?"

It took a few seconds before Orihime smiled softly at Rukia.

"What do you mean, Rukia-chan? I'm really happy with the way things are right now."

The youngest Kuchiki scowled as she saw past through the healer. That smile was fake and she hated it.

"Did he do something to you? I knew it, just when you finally confessed to him those months ago-"

"Tulips, Rukia-chan."

The female soul reaper was cut off when she heard the healer mumble.

"Tulips? What about 'em?"

Orihime held up the red tulip in her hand and tucked it into the side of Rukia's head, bringing about a blush to the older woman's cheeks.

"O-Orihime… What are you-"

The healer smiled sweetly, the smile was again, fake; and it made the blushing Rukia back to normal.

"Aside from roses, tulips are used for Valentine's day too. It represents passionate love."

Rukia plucked off the tulip from her hair and looked at it. "Orihime-"

"I wanted to give Ichigo-kun a red tulip for Valentine's Day, that would have been a nice present, right, Rukia-chan?"

The dark-haired woman turned violet eyes towards her friend, and there wasn't a smile on Orihime's face. Her eyes looked pained for some reason, and gently, Rukia held her friend in a warm hug. She held Orihime's head against her chest, and she felt Orihime's body relaxing within her embrace.

"What actually happened, Orihime?"

The silent girl closed her eyes as she fought against the tears clouding her eyes.

"I can see through him, Rukia-chan. Every time we're together, I can see whenever he thinks of Senna-san… He said he loves me but… I know, that he can't fully love me back. Even if I love him so much… Rukia-chan…"

Her voice began to break, and she wrapped her arms around Rukia's small, small but comforting body to hug her closer. She buried her face against the Kuchiki's chest, and tears started to come down.

"Am I selfish, Rukia-chan?"

Rukia closed her eyes as she tightened her hold on Orihime. "The selfish one here is him, Orihime."

Seeing the girl in her arms cry her eyes out, Rukia knew that Orihime had stayed in Soul Society was not solely because of Unohana's favour, but the girl had no one to cry onto. Tatsuki was away on tournaments and she couldn't have gone to Ichigo either, because he was the reason her friend was crying in her arms at that moment.

Rukia inwardly cursed. This wasn't what she brought those two redheads together in the first place for.

"Sorry, Orihime. This is all my fault."

She could feel Orihime tense. The girl lifted her face to look at Rukia, tears streaming down her widened eyes.

"No! Rukia-chan, you brought me and Ichigo-kun together-"

The small smile on Rukia's face stopped Orihime.

"That's why I should be blamed."

Orihime shook her head and tightened her hold onto Rukia.

"Rukia-chan you're wrong! It's nobody's fault that this happened. If anything, it's my fault that I agreed to this. I should have known Ichigo-kun's feelings."

A dry chuckle escaped Rukia's lips. "Baka Orihime. Now you're blaming yourself."

The girl buried her face against Rukia's chest as a sad smile graced her lips.

"I really am stupid, ne?"

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><p><em><strong>It breaks your heart to see the one you love is happy with someone else, but it's more painful to know that the one you love is unhappy with you.<strong>_

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><p>He knew it. She had been crying again.<p>

She was back from Soul Society a few weeks ago and now they were in her apartment, watching Laugh Hour together. She was smiling as she watched the television, but there was no laughter ringing throughout her apartment like how it used to be. She was smiling yet her eyes didn't have that glow in them, that made him want to laugh along whenever she did.

What was wrong with her?

It was already four months since she confessed to him, and he was confused at first. It was more like he was completely dumbfounded when she came to his apartment in the dead of a chilly November night, standing in front of his door and instantly kissed him.

He had blushed furiously, matching her red face when she sputtered out how she had loved him for so long just after she broke the clumsy kiss. She had been standing outside his apartment. And he had let her stand there, still stupefied by the sudden confession and lingering warmth of her lips when she kissed him.

They had stood looking at each other for a few seconds, silence stretching between them when she suddenly burst into nervous laughter.

"I-I'm so sorry for bothering you this late. Maybe Rukia-chan and Rangiku-san were mistaken, yes, that's it! Forget what I just said, Kurosaki-kun! Um… Bye!"

"Wait."

He had pulled her inside then, and after he closed the door, he had held her in her arms. He was silent the first few seconds when Orihime tried to wiggle free, her face blushing.

"Kuro-Kurosaki-kun… I-"

"Thank you."

He had thanked her that time.

It just came out of nowhere.

He had been heartbroken when Senna died.

He hadn't known what to do. But Orihime had been there to cheer him up even when he was still hurting inside, and it seemed natural at that time to start anew with the healer.

He had thought that maybe if he had someone else to love, he would be able to forget the pain in his chest whenever he walked pass the cemetery where _her_ gravestone was embedded.

He had thought that he meant it when he made that promise, the promise to love Orihime.

And the first two months were blissful. Or so he thought. Everything came crashing down the moment Orihime decided to pray at the shrine for New Year Eve. She had asked him what he was wishing for, and he accidentally whispered out _her _name.

"Senna…"

She had looked at him then, a weird smile on her lips. He looked back at her, speechless.

"I understand, Ichigo-kun… You prayed for Senna-san, right?"

The orange-top averted his eyes somewhere where he hadn't needed to look into her grey eyes. Her beautiful and shining grey eyes.

"I'm… sorry…"

She had just smiled then, and she instantly forgave him.

Looking at her tired face, he hoped things would be the way it was before.

"Orihime…"

He called to her. She turned to him, her fake smile still in place and the television forgotten.

"Yes?"

The Visored searched her eyes. "Have you been crying?"

It was just a fraction, but he saw the way her smile faltered a bit. She laughed and shook her head. Almost all-too urgently, she stood up and headed to the kitchen.

"Why would I cry? Ichigo-kun is here with me so I'm really happy right now. I'm making tea, okay?"

Ichigo fought the urge to groan out in frustration when she answered his question with that fake smile of hers. He stood up and joined her in the small kitchen. Hesitantly, he put a hand onto her small shoulder.

"Hey."

She didn't turn around to look at him when she started talking, while her hands were busy spooning sugar into a teapot.

"Really, Ichigo-kun. I'm really happy that you're here with me. You're busy with your studies but you're here to keep me company… why shouldn't I be happy? Oh, and I know it's probably too late, but I stayed at Rukia-chan's house when I was in Soul Society. Do you know that the Kuchikis have a nice garden? They even have tulips!"

She poured hot water into the teapot, and when she swirled around to talk to Ichigo she nearly collided into his hard chest.

"Ichigo-kun, excuse me… The tea is ready and-"

"Orihime."

He tilted her face by the chin and made her look at him. She smiled nervously when he looked into her eyes.

"Um… yes?"

"What's wrong with you? Tell me, Orihime."

His voice was soothing when he talked, and he brought up a hand to brush a thumb over her cheek. After a few seconds just looking at his face, Orihime smiled sadly at him.

"Ichigo-kun… do you remember how we got together?"

He nodded. Of course he remembered. It was a first for him when a girl actually confessed to him. When he dated Senna, she didn't even need to confess to him because they were always aware of each other. But he hadn't known of Orihime's feelings even when he had known the healer longer than he knew Senna.

Orihime tiptoed and kissed the tip of Ichigo's nose. He blinked, momentarily caught off-guard by her action.

"I remember what I said that day… When I confessed to you… I meant every word that I said. Do you know that, Ichigo-kun?"

Again, Ichigo nodded.

"Can you tell me what I said to you at that time?"

"You fell in love with me since we were eight, the night your brother died."

The healer's smile widened, and Ichigo could see her eyes starting to get glassy.

"And I said that I loved only you and no one else will make my heart beat as fast as you do."

He could feel the corners of his mouth tug up a bit.

"And that you even love the way I scowl."

Orihime laughed softly, and for the first time after weeks, he could feel his heart soften at the sound of her laughter.

"Yep, that too."

He leaned down to kiss her eye lids. "And you said you love me too much that it makes you crazy whenever you think about confessing to me."

She nodded and closed her eyes.

"Do you feel the same way, Ichigo-kun?"

Instantly the small smile on his lips fell. He remained speechless as he looked at her smiling face.

"Orihime…"

Said name stepped back a few.

"I'm sorry Ichigo-kun… If I had known I wouldn't have confessed to you."

"What… what are you talking about?"

The healer sat on the kitchen counter top.

"I never noticed it the first two months when we started dating… but when I think about it again… you really do love Senna-san… You probably still love her… am I right?"

Ichigo's hands fell to his sides as he averted his eyes.

"I really liked Senna-san too. She was a great friend, even though she joined on the last year of High School."

Orihime lowered her head to look at her dangling feet. When Ichigo cleared his throat, she looked up. She thought of something for a while. Again, she felt the tears clouding her eyes and the painful twist in her chest as she made a decision.

Ichigo watched as she hopped off the counter and walked towards him, only stopping when her chest nearly brushed his.

"I'm sorry, Ichigo-kun… I love you so much that I thought I could replace Senna-san. I thought that maybe you needed somebody to love you to heal your pain… But I'm wrong. I had always noticed, Ichigo-kun… when you would look at the things she used to love… like that park behind Isshin-san's clinic, or the ramen stand near our High School… I'm sorry that I acted ignorant… But I can't anymore."

He closed his eyes as she cupped his face in her small hands. Her hands were warm.

"I'm sorry to end it like this, Ichigo-kun… but it hurts to know that you're not happy when you're with me. I know it's hard for you to love me back, because you have given most of your heart to Senna-san…"

"I love you too, Orihime."

She swallowed the lump in her throat, and with all the strength that she had, she smiled at him when he opened his eyes to look at her.

"I know, but your heart still belongs to Senna-san… I have been watching you when you were with her, and I've never seen you look at me the way you used to look at her."

The truth of what she said rendered him speechless yet again. He didn't know what he should say, because the things she said to him were true. He never noticed it, but hearing her say it made him notice how he had always thought of Senna whenever he looked at Orihime.

When Orihime laughed, he would think of Senna's carefree laughter.

Every time he saw Orihime clumsily dusting the ceiling of his apartment, he would see Senna changing the light bulb in his living room.

When Orihime ate, he would see Senna eating her favourite ice-cream with the same gusto Orihime had.

He could feel Orihime wrapping her arms around him in a warm hug, and his heart clenched when he caught a whiff of her hair as she buried her face into his lean chest.

She smelled like strawberries.

"I think… this is goodbye, Ichigo-kun… I really love you, and I still love you, but you still can't open your heart to anyone else yet… so it's best if we stop here."

Without realizing it, a single tear rolled down her cheek when Ichigo hugged her back. He rested his chin atop her head.

"I'm sorry, Orihime."

Her voice was pained when she let out a soft giggle.

"Thank you for being with me even for a while, Ichigo-kun."

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><p><em><strong>A guy and a girl can be just friends, but at one point or another, they will fall for each other, maybe temporarily, maybe at the wrong time, maybe too late, or maybe forever - Dave Matthews<strong>_

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><p>He finally graduated. After six long years of medical textbooks and hellish exams, he finally graduated.<p>

"Onii-chan, congratulations!"

Ichigo smiled at Yuzu as she enveloped him in a big hug. Karin appeared behind Yuzu, carrying something in her hands while a blush faintly dusted her cheeks.

"Hm? Karin? What's wrong with you?"

The dark-haired girl lowered her head in embarrassment as she thrust a bouquet of flowers towards him.

"Here, Ichi-nii. Congrats."

Yuzu squealed in delight as Ichigo took the flowers from Karin.

"These flowers are beautiful, Karin-chan! I didn't know you're this kind of person!"

A vein popped on the older twin's temple as she eyed the light-haired sister.

"What is that supposed to mean, Yuzu?"

A hand patted her head, and Karin looked up to see her brother grinning at her.

"Thanks, Karin."

She smiled back. "You look good in that robe, Ichi-nii."

Ichigo scratched the back of his head. "Really? The girls were complaining about how loose these robes were."

Yuzu took the flowers from Ichigo and smelled them.

"I think the robe looked fine when Orihime-chan wore it two years ago. Ne, Karin?"

Ichigo's hand froze. Karin nudged her twin as she saw the way her brother's eyes looked at the scroll in his hand. Trying to liven up the atmosphere, Yuzu laughed nervously.

"Hey, where's otou-chan?"

Ichigo's ears perked up when he heard Yuzu, and as if on cue, a dark-haired man appeared through the double doors of the graduation hall.

"ICHIGO MY SON!"

All eyes were focused on the loud father and Ichigo fought from groaning out loud when his dad revelled in the camera flashes.

"YESS! THAT'S MY SON THERE! HE'S A GOOD SON WHO'S GONNA HELP ME MANAGE MY CLINIC IN THIS LOVELY HOMETOWN!"

His children sweat dropped, and Ichigo's face fell. He dragged a hand down his face as laughter erupted throughout the hall.

"Damn it, baka Oya-"

"IIICHIIGOO!"

Said name didn't see the flying kick coming from his father all the way from the other side of the hall. A few seconds after Isshin's surprise attack, the orange top managed to throw his father away, sending the former shinigami captain flying away a good five metres from him.

A vein popped on Ichigo's forehead as he cracked his knuckles.

"Stupid Oyaji! I just graduated and THIS is how you treat me?"

As if just realizing, Isshin immediately caught his son in a death hug.

"Oh, Masaki! Our son has graduated into the most honourable doctor I could imagine! Look at him, Masaki! He's so good-looking with this robe that I just can't help but cry!"

Ichigo's eyes softened when Isshin mentioned Masaki's name. If only his mother was there, how great would it be?

"Ichigo, my buddy!"

He was caught in a death grip as soon as Keigo came bouncing onto his back. Mizuiro was busy texting one of his girlfriends as he came after the brown-haired man.

"Keigo, get off me!"

Chad and Tatsuki came later. The gentle giant had easily plucked Keigo off Ichigo and Tatsuki had given him a punch to the shoulder and a congratulations.

"Thanks for coming, guys."

Chad gave a thumbs up. "Ichigo, Ishida said congratulations too."

Ichigo smirked. "Man, I can't believe we graduated on the same day."

Isshin laughed out loud, making Ichigo pray silently so that his father wouldn't do anything more stupid.

"What, Ichigo? Does that mean you actually think he's a better genius than you?"

His brow twitched as he looked at Isshin.

"Oyaji…"

"Ah, there you are Ichigo-kun!"

All eyes turned towards the familiar voice.

Ichigo swallowed as he saw her.

There she was, in a simple blue blouse and white skirt and her long flowing hair. She beamed a smile as Isshin and the others greeted her. He watched as she approached him, a bouquet of cream-colored tulips in her hands. The clothes were simple, but to Ichigo she looked beautiful than ever. She had graduated earlier than he had, along with Chad, Tatsuki and the others and he hadn't seen her for two years when she moved to another part of Karakura Town to teach at a Junior High School.

She approached him, her smile widening, leaving him no choice but to smile back even slightly.

He tried to rack his brain for words, and it wasn't easy when he had eyes burning a hole through the back of his head.

"Hey."

She giggled, and he didn't know if he could feel anymore dumb than he was already.

"Here, Ichigo-kun. Congratulations!"

He nodded and said a quiet 'thanks' when he took the tulips from her.

Why tulips?

He saw a note tucked at the ribbon tying the flowers together and made a side note to read it when he would get back.

Yuzu's head peeked from behind him to smile at the healer.

"Orihime-chan! I haven't seen you for a while!"

"I know. It's really good to see you all."

She smiled at him, and his heart clenched to know that he had missed those smiles.

"Orihime-chan, will you stay here?"

The healer seemed reluctant to leave his eyes when she answered Karin.

"I'm afraid I can't. I need to prepare my students for their exams. I just came here to see Ichigo-kun."

She blushed a bit as she made that statement, and Ichigo thought he heard Tatsuki clearing her throat. Or was it Karin?

The Visored watched as Karin, Yuzu and Tatsuki give Orihime a hug and bid the healer goodbye. Chad had to keep a hold on Keigo as they both said their farewells to Orihime before disappearing somewhere to look for Ishida. Mizuiro and Tatsuki followed suit.

"Have a safe trip home. You know you can always come back for the summer break, right?"

Isshin said as he pulled Orihime into a big hug. Ichigo was about to pull his dad away when Karin beat him to it.

"Whaat? Ichigo wasn't going to hug Orihime-chan so I did it for him! Hey Ichigo! Say bye-bye to lovely Orihime-chan!"

He stepped towards Orihime, and cleared his throat.

"Thanks again, Orihime."

She smiled. He would miss that smile.

"You're welcome, Ichigo-kun. So then…"

He smiled a bit, and lend out a hand.

"Yeah… have a safe trip home."

She took his hand, gave it a light squeeze before she prepared to turn around but not quite doing so.

"Bye, Ichigo-kun."

"Bye."

She gave him a last smile before she turned around and headed for the doors. He stared at the path she had taken when she left them, and suddenly he felt himself feel a sense of longing.

Why was love so hard?

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><p>His chest felt heavy as he plopped onto his bed. His family had gone home a few hours earlier after they celebrated at his apartment. He was left alone in the lonely apartment, left looking at the picture of Orihime in the frame on his bedside table. The picture was taken on her graduation ceremony two years ago, and the reason he kept that picture was because she was smiling. He hadn't seen her smile like that when they used to date and again, like any other times, he felt the familiar pain in his chest.<p>

She was braver than he was when she decided they should break up.

"Orihime…"

He said her name, and his eyes searched for the tulips she had given him. They were arranged neatly in a water-filled vase, and if it wasn't for Yuzu, he would have thrown the flowers away. He hated the flowers, because looking at them reminded him of Orihime and how stupid he was to let go of her. The note she wrote was left unread on top of his television. Thinking twice, Ichigo finally made his way to read the note.

_Dear Ichigo-kun,_

_I read once that a tulip's velvety black centre represents a lover's heart, darkened by the heat of passion… that's pretty deep, right? But you know, it got me thinking, that if you love me back the way you I love you, maybe I can give you a red tulip. But I know you can't, even if you want to, and for that I decided to give you a cream colored tulip. Because I know that I can't replace Senna-san… I just want you to know that a cream tulip means eternal love, and I will always love you, for five lifetimes… and more._

_Orihime._

With steps as heavy as lead, Ichigo plopped back onto his bed, Orihime's note crumpled in his hand.

"Kami-sama, what have I done?"

He turned his head towards the picture in the frame, and picked it up from the small table. His eyes dropped to the small picture of Senna at the right bottom corner of Orihime's picture, and after contemplating for two years, he finally took out Senna's picture and put it in one of his old books before he shoved the book in the deepest part of his bookshelf.

He turned towards Orihime's picture, and everything came rushing back to him.

Her smiles.

Her laughter.

Her kisses.

It was amazing how she had imprinted herself in him for a short two months.

She had rushed to his place in the middle of a chilly November night. He was speechless when she pulled him down for a kiss. When she broke the kiss, her cheeks were red of embarrassment.

"_I came here to let you know that I fell in love with you since we were eight. That night when my brother died, you were there for me and I instantly told myself that I will grow up loving you."_

Heat had crept up his face.

"_Inoue-"_

She had silenced him with another clumsy kiss.

"_I want you to know that even though you've dated Senna-san before, I will only love you and no one else because no one makes my heart beats as fast as you do. I know this is stupid but I even love how you scowl and… and I love you too much that it makes me crazy! Yes, crazy, because I don't know what I should do to let you know how strongly I feel about you."_

He had stood there, not knowing what to do.

Then she had said it again.

"_I love you, Kurosaki-kun!"_

His fingers traced Orihime's face in the picture. A smile ghosted on his lips.

"I love you too, Orihime."

And this time he meant it.

Only this time, it might have been too late.

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><p>AN: Yaah… finally finished this one. It was quite hard to write a story in this kind of genre, I usually write happy and fluffy ones but when it comes to hurt… gah, I'm a mess. But I hope this is good enough for all the IchiHime lovers out there. Huh? What? Yeah, I noticed too that I used a lot of quotes in this fic. I actually wrote this first then I incorporated the quotes later. That was where all the work came from, aside from racking my brains for words. I'm sorry if there are grammatical errors, as I do not have a beta reader. That's right Luver182, I don't have a B.E.T.A reader, as you assume I do. I offered to be a beta reader for an author once, but she didn't contact me back so whatever. Anyways, I would really be happy if I get nice reviews on this one. Hehehe. Oh my, sly me.

Hugs and kisses!


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